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Well, the drive back tonight sucked.....crappy weather.....it wasn't the worst drive I've had on that highway, but there were moments tonight that reminded me of that worst time. Christmas was ok, saw some family, friends, ate good food, and was sick the entire time. Still sick as I write this. My flu-like symptoms turned to cold-like symptoms sometime around late Christmas Eve. Awesome.

Oh, just remembered, I had this big deal I felt I had to post, some old memory that came to me as I was lying in bed the first night back. Not sure if I'm entirely in the mood to post it however. Basically it was this old memory that I either keep forgetting, or repressing....so I wanted to put it on here so it could be recorded. Well, just posting this will remind me, and who knows, maybe I'll post it later tonight?

That's what I'll do....mmmmmmaybe. a bientot.


1:34AM -Back Back!

Well, here I am, again. I guess the good thing about having access to my cpu and my blogspot account is that I can post any random thing that comes to mind without giving it a second thought-having three days to mull over something sucks. It's all about spontaneity. I will still give up the goods though.

So anyway, the first night I was in the valley, right before falling asleep, I remembered this one thing for some reason or another. Here's the setup-This takes place when I was 12, in Grade 6, and living in Halifax. So, to begin, there was this girl in my class, Jacqueline, very pretty, smart, and shy-as was I, since I never made a move to even get to know her. Anyway, I can't remember how this happened, but it actually got out that I liked her, and she definitely knew it-but still I did nothing. The exact time of these particular happenings is completely beyond my recollection, but I do know that this is what happened next shortly after it was discovered by the entire class that I did like her. First, I went to the valley for almost a week to visit my dentist-excessive? not really. My parents spent thousands on my teeth as a child, so we wanted the same dentist who had performed all the previous surgeries to do a check-up. I stayed with my grandparents in Kingston, and came back to Halifax just in time to catch the second half of a school day. So, I go to school, and find out that J. has invited everyone in the class to her birthday party that Friday after school. Invitations were given out earlier that week and everything. I'll cut out the pulp, and just tell you that I neither asked her about the party, nor was given an invitation by her. I was told by my friends to just go, but I never did. After class was out that Friday, I just walked home while the rest of the class gathered to go to her house.

So, that's that. I don't know if I block that or what, but it definitely felt crappy at the time, so I'm wondering about the effect that may have on me now. There's nothing malicious there, just two really shy people who never had the guts to talk to each other I'd say. So odd that I never think of that-aside from the other night, the last time I thought of that.....seriously can't remember, it's been that long. Having a crush on that girl as long as I did, and then having the dumb-luck for her to find out and not see it as a bad thing-and that's the other part to this, I feel fairly safe in thinking that she was interested....but too shy to do anything about it. Don't get me wrong though, this isn't anything to do with regret-no regrets-just investigating and theorizing.

I guess this is one of those things were I get to put-no one bother to leave any comments on it-this is here purely to remind me so I don't forget again, and to go through whatever exhibitionism this blog could be classified under.

Bonne Nuit.